Reasons to Look at the Stars

You’re Spinning on a Ball of Dirt and Made of Collapsed Stars

To get some distance from this, you first need to get some perspective. Walk outside on a clear night and just look up into the sky. You are sitting on a planet spinning around in the middle of absolutely nowhere. Though you can only see a few thousand stars, there are hundreds of billions of stars in our Milky Way Galaxy alone. In fact, it is estimated that there are over a trillion stars in the Spiral Galaxy. And that galaxy would look like one star to us, if we could even see it. You’re just standing on one little ball of dirt and spinning around one of the stars. From that perspective, do you really care what people think about your clothes or your car? Do you really need to feel embarrassed if you forget someone’s name? How can you let these meaningless things cause pain? If you want out, if you want a decent life, you had better not devote your life to avoiding psychological pain. You had better not spend your life worrying about whether people like you or whether your car impresses people. What kind of life is that? It is a life of pain. You may not think that you feel pain that often, but you really do. To spend your life avoiding pain means it’s always right behind you.” Michael Singer

As I think about the coming summer I look forward to being outside on a warm night, laying down in the grass, on a rock, or in a hammock and gazing up. If you have never let yourself get lost in the stars, I think this is the year to start. It creates a sense of stillness and calm, can be relaxing, and puts you in tune with nature.  It encourages us to look at the world around us instead of being so focused on ourselves.

We are always in we cannot be "stuck"

The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff.”  ―Carl Sagan

Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.”
― Marcus Aurelias

Star GazingI think that we are like stars. Something happens to burst us open; but when we burst open and think we are dying; we’re actually turning into a supernova. And then when we look at ourselves again, we see that we’re suddenly more beautiful than we ever were before!” C. JoyBell

You Will Wish You Had Started Today

“A year from now you may wish you had started today” –Karen Lamb

 Spring is a time for planting seeds. It is the time to begin advancing your dreams. Make the personal changes you have been thinking about. Move your ideas productively and creatively forward. What else can you do right now to get the things you see in your future? Dig into the soil of your fertile mind. Keep planting. Remember that what you plant now, you will get to harvest later. Plant things you truly want. If you plant nothing new, you will harvest nothing new.

"Start where you are, use what you have, do what you can." Arthur Ashe

“Start where you are, use what you have, do what you can.” Arthur Ashe


Start saving today, book that ticket now, write the first page of your book tonight, apply for that job, clean out the spare bedroom, throw out your ex’s stuff, exercise while reading this, say hi to your crush, learn how to read music on YouTube so you can learn how to play your musical instrument, repair your car and your relationships. Plant perennials in the garden of your life. You, your dreams, and your life will grow. 

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.” Mark Twain

Take A Look At Reality

“If you want to be happy, you have to let go of the part of you that wants to create melodrama. This is the part that thinks there’s a reason not to be happy. You have to transcend the personal, and as you do, you will naturally awaken to the higher aspects of your being. In the end, enjoying life’s experiences is the only rational thing to do. You’re sitting on a planet spinning around in the middle of absolutely nowhere. Go ahead, take a look at reality. You’re floating in empty space in a universe that goes on forever. If you have to be here, at least be happy and enjoy the experience. You’re going to die anyway. Things are going to happen anyway. Why shouldn’t you be happy? You gain nothing by being bothered by life’s events. It doesn’t change the world; you just suffer. There’s always going to be something that can bother you, if you let it.”
― Michael Singer

Recently, I lost my happy for a little bit. I got bothered by insecurities, overwhelm, judgement, and fear. These are the gremlins of the mind and they are self-destructive liars. If any of those feelings were real people with real voices we would never let them integrate themselves into our lives. We would call them cruel bullies and tell our kids not to play with them at school. However, because they are invisible we forgot they aren’t real. We let them thrash about inside our body and mind and climb into a vat of goop.

I lost myself in some goop. Goop is gross. It is sticky and yucky and awful.


We all get lost once in a while. Certain situations or triggers can set us off down a painful, anxious road. It doesn’t matter, we just have to take a step back in those moments and get in touch with reality. Wash off the goop and remember a few good things. We are here, we are alive, we are okay, it will all work out. We are smart, resourceful beings that will figure it out.

I want to be happy. I want you to be happy.

We have nothing to gain by being bothered by life’s events.

That is reality.

Nothing else matters.

The truth is that most of life will unfold in accordance with forces far outside your control, regardless of what your mind says about it.”
― Michael Singer

Authenticity or Safety?

“If you trade your authenticity for safety, you may experience the following: anxiety, depression, eating disorders, addiction, rage, blame, resentment, and inexplicable grief.” -Brene Brown

Errrrr….that sentence terrifies me.

If you have experienced even one of the listed consequences of not living authentically (as predicted by the amazing researcher, Brene Brown) it probably scares you too. Also, if you have never experienced them (anxiety, depression, grief…etc) please call me and tell me all your secrets to life. Thank you.

“Authenticity requires a certain measure of vulnerability, transparency, and integrity” –Janet Louise Stepenson

Being authentic requires a constant checking in with the self. We need to ask ourselves: Why am I pursuing the things I am working towards? Is it for me or someone else? Do I really want this or that or I do I want it because everyone else has it? Am I doing this because it is easy? Am I trying to make it hard for myself? What do I really want? What matters most to me?

Authenticity requires reflection and reevaluation. It requires acceptance. It requires saying Yes! and No! It requires speaking your truth. It requires courage. It means not waiting. Being authentic can mean disappointing others. Many times it requires going against the crowd. It means listening to yourself and following your gut. It means not listening to advice, even good advice (like this). Being authentic means going after dreams, letting go of doubts, and exposure. Being authentic means freedom. If you dare to be authentic, it means you are claiming your freedom to be yourself.

Stop living someone else’s life. You have so much more to offer as yourself.

“We have to dare to be ourselves, however frightening or strange that self may prove to be.” –May Sarton

This is us having fun and being silly...feels authentic to me... :)

This is us having fun and being silly…feels authentic to me… :)

Fraternizing with Fear

Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones.”  -Thich Nhat Hanh

Fear fascinates me. I have seen it box myself and others in so we can’t see our way out. I have seen it kill amazing talent, ideas, hopes, and dreams. I have seen completely rational, intelligent people become completely crippled by worry and anxiety. I have felt its paralyzing grip as I tried unsuccessfully to hide from it under the covers.

I have also seen it overcome, it looks AWESOME.

Facing our fears head on is exhilarating, so please do that whenever you can.

Sometimes we can’t so easily get to the other side of fear. I’ve dealt with it in a variety of ways. Once, I decided I was going to conquer fear once and for all by jumping out of a plane…At the time I really thought this would help cure the fear out my life for good. After it was over I was still scared of not being “enough” and public speaking. DIDN’T WORK. So, I don’t particularly recommend the technique unless it is on your bucket list.

This is me signing the death waiver before going sky diving for the first time.

This is me signing the death waiver before going skydiving for the first time…that is my “I’m terrified laugh.”

Here are some things that have actually helped me around fear: Facing it, focusing on how good it will feel to do the thing I am scared of instead of the thing itself, remembering to stay present, laughing, reaching out to supportive people, taking a nap to get back to my rational self, acupuncture to rebalance the insane chemicals it makes the body produce, really good hugs, spending time in nature to gain some perspective, coaches, gratitude, meditation, anything self-nurturing, yoga, and love (giving it wherever I can and accepting it wherever and from whomever is willing to give it.)

“What is needed, rather than running away or controlling or suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it, learn about it, come directly into contact with it. We are to learn about fear, not how to escape from it.” -Jiddu Krishnamurti

Frick “FINE”

Settling – a gradual sinking to a lower level.

“How are you doing?” “Fine.” we answer. Well, I guess it is a better feeling than everything sucks right now, but at least with “everything sucks right now” we know we need to change or do something different.

When we are fine, there can be a slump, things are going okay so we stop pushing ourselves and pursuing other things. Eventually something happens to rattle us out of sleep walking. The rattler could be a new person, a tragedy, a new perspective, new experience, old journal entry, book, quote, blog, event, or sometimes a wake up call from a friend. The rattler is meant to catapult us out of monotony so we can remember that we are not someone that is okay with “fine” or an auto-pilot life, and hopefully, we do something about it.

An incredible life does not happen by accident, it happens on purpose.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

I want to fully pursue my ideas, I want to learn to dance the way my grandmother did, to teach more and more people how to stay well, to have amazing relationships, to give incredibly and whole heartedly, to be fully present, to explore the world and myself, to tap all the potential I can find within myself that could possibly contribute to a better world and a better me. In order to do any of those things I am going to have to keep growing, learning, and risking failure.  At some point I am going to get insanely uncomfortable. Sometimes I am going to have to make myself do crap I don’t want to do so that I can get closer to everything I would like to be and that can be hard. So sometimes I am just going to have to force myself to do those things anyway, because FINE is not fine with me.

What do you want? What are you waiting for? No one is coming and you are never going to feel like it, so go get it now.

“Don’t be afraid to give up the good and go for the great.” Steven Pressfield

Katie Fisher Day: Sending Love

There is something very sentimental about the cookie. The memories I have attached to them fill me with tenderness and warmth. My grandmother stores them on the counter in a cracked Ernie jar and always has some at the ready, just in case, anytime of year. Those cookies have brought smiles to the entire family, the jar a treasure chest filled with the best kind of gold. We were artists when we frosted her sugar cookies together at Christmas time, and now the tradition continues on with my niece. I remember I was about to drive home from my aunt’s house and when I got in the car there were two bottles of water and several homemade fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies. Can you think of a better surprise before a long ride? The memory is forever etched in my brain because I was so touched by the thought and love in the gesture. Which is why, as someone who normally would tell you to stay the heck away from sugar, I am instead telling you to get baking, because there is nothing more powerful than spreading love. On March 12th, in honor of Katie Fisher Day, spread the love, bake and send some cookies! It will be awesome for you and the person that receives them.

About Katie Fisher Day: Katie Fisher day celebrates the life of a brilliant engineer, a beautiful dancer, and a wonderful daughter, sister, and friend. Among other wonderful things she did in her life, she baked cookies for her brother every single week for the four years he was away at college. She never missed an opportunity to make her loved ones feel more loved. In the summer of 2010, Katie was killed in a car accident. She was 24.

So, in an attempt to honor her memory and to show each other some measure of the love that Katie showed to us, we’ve decided to try to encourage people to be a little bit more wonderful to each other. March 12th was Katie’s birthday. We declare it “Katie Fisher Day”. Our goal is to get everyone in the world to follow Katie’s example, and send some cookies to someone they love. To participate please visit and get baking.

And whenever you can, be a little bit more wonderful to each other.

20141211_205543 Hot Cocoa Cookies for Katie Fisher Day.

Quotes to Inspire You Every Winter

Winter can be a challenging time, schedules get disrupted due to weather, the days are shorter, and we get less sun and Vitamin D, our happy vitamin. We need to stay happy, inspired, and motivated, no matter what the season. Here are some quotes that help me remember to be at my best even when its cold out, I can’t find my other glove, and my car can’t leave the driveway.

Snowy Days

“In the depth of winter I finally learned that there was in my an invincible summer.” -Albert Camus

“Winter is a lingering season, is a time to gather golden moments, embark upon a sentimental journey, and every idle hour.” -John Boswell

“People don’t notice whether it is winter or summer when they’re happy.” -Anton Chekov

“The days are getting colder, have a warm heart.”

If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.” -Anne Bradstreet

One kind word can warm three winter months” -Japanese Proverb

O Winter! ruler of the inverted year…I crown thee king of intimate delights, fireside enjoyments, home-born happiness, and all the comforts that the lowly roof of undisturbed retirement, and the hours of long uninterrupted evening, know.” William Cowper

and my favorite

Lets book a vacation somewhere warm.” -Me

Grow Your Life: Ways to Grow Your Relationships, Business, and You

“If a relationship is not growing, if a business is not growing, if you’re not growing, it doesn’t matter how much money you have in the bank, how many friends you have, how many people you love- you’re not going to experience real fulfillment. And the reason we grow, I believe, is so we have something of value to give.” Tony Robbins

Grow Your Relationships: Do something new together, share a secret, forgive, learn from the other person, focus on how you can give, let go of expectations, do something loving every chance you get, say thank you

Grow Your Business: Offer something new, have a certain percentage of profits go to charity, get better at what you do, accept that you can’t do everything, hire help, learn more about your business, write an article, try something new, start an online store, start a blog, take yourself seriously, get organized, commit to growth, set intentions, practice consistency, make and take action steps, be open to new opportunities, grow yourself.20150104_125116

Grow Yourself: Meditate, do yoga, exercise, practice awareness, learn things, do a detox, hire a coach, journal, reflect, laugh, take a class, do the things you’ve been meaning to do, value your health, value others, take risks, be honest with yourself and others, face fears, go after your dreams, read books, be open-minded, spend time in nature

6 Ways to Honor Yourself this Winter

“I still believe in summer days.
The seasons always change
and life will find a way.”

Honor yourself this winter:

  1. Stay Warm. Wear warm clothing both outside and inside your home. Organic cotton and wool are the best materials because they allow your skin to breathe and sweat (one of the ways we detoxify). Keep your socks on in the house, or wool slippers, or both. Energy leaves us through our extremities. Socks and slippers make a huge difference keeping us warm.
  2. Take warm epsom salt baths, or even long warm showers if a bath is not available and then slather your skin with organic coconut, jojoba, or grape seed oil. 
  3. Drink lots of hot herbal teas. Nettle, ginger, and rooibos chai are my favorites this time of year
  4.  Winter is a time for reflection. Reflect on what you want to accomplish this year and outline your plan.
  5. Make your liquid meal a warm soup instead of a cold smoothie or juice, especially at night.
  6.  If you have a fireplace, use it. Gas or wood—there is something very nurturing about relaxing around the fire beyond just the temperature it generates.